Many resentful feelings on my end because the kids are too old to be entitled freeloaders and should be helping more around the house. Feeling that they should be grateful for the mom taxi taking them everywhere, doing their laundry and making their lunches. But that's not the reality, they aren't even aware that I feel this way sometimes and if I tell them they shrug it off. It's not that they don't care, I have to remember that they are kids and so all consumed with their own reality that its always a shocker to them when I get fed up. Instead of a "thank you, mom" it's a "you put WHAT in my lunch? Gross" and when you ask them to take their clean, sorted, folded laundry to their room you would think you asked them to scrub the kitchen floor with a toothbrush. I should probably be asking them to do more, but with the resistance I get with the few things we do ask it seems easier sometimes to just do it myself. Truth be told, I'm a control freak and they aren't the best at cleaning to my expectations and I have to do it again so it's easier for me to just do it myself.
We have a lot of kids (7 in the home right now, ages 12, 11, 10, 4, 2, 1 and 5 months) and that equals a lot of pure maintenance work for the parents. Lots of dishes, laundry, taxiing, listening, playing, tucking in, feeding, etc. This is a choice and I'm not complaining, just tired.
I love a big family and I wouldn't change it for the world but there are days when I wonder how life would be different with just one child. Would we be always hanging out and talking about our feelings? We connect with our kids daily, sit with them through their struggles and do our best to empathize and help resolve issues. We make family time and read with them after we put the babies to bed. We support each other but life is rushing by.
I am being very intentional to the things I say YES to lately. Honoring time and togetherness. We are surely missing out on amazing events, but we are becoming stronger as a family.
This I must remember this week as things seem to be in chaos mode. Take time to sit down and breathe it in. These days that our kids (the boys especially) want to spend their time with us is rapidly passing and I don't want to miss a minute.